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Writer's picturesamarth gupta

Bulla ki Jaana mei Kaun? The dilemmas of a modern Wildlife photographer.

My friend visited Vipassana Meditation Center, where you can go for a 10-day or 30-day meditation retreat; well, he took a 30-day package. When I asked him what he had found there, he said one thing. He found himself, he got a deeper understanding of himself his fears, his ambitions, the mask he had on him were removed.


When I told my wife this, she found it cliche. Well, after all, why do you want to know this? Don't we know who we are? What do we want?


This question troubled me, however: do I know myself as a blog writer or a civil engineer? Do I really love photography, or is it a fad? I love reading books, so am I a professor. Upon reading all these philosophies, I have become a philosopher, or I am just a sham.


Today I visited the art gallery at 'Nita Mukesh Ambani Culture Center Mumbai' with theme as 'Wildlife Photographer of the Year': where the world's best wildlife photographers had their exhibition. I had no plan on visiting it; I should be excited to visit it, right? but no, was too busy, with my day to day life however today we were roaming here and there saw this event on book my show and we landed there.




(The above picutures were taken at NMCC exhibition)

And that prompted me to write a blog after one year. Why now? For the last year , I have been in this dilemma. Why am I doing this? Why this hobby? Spending so much money and I am not even a good photographer with nothing much to show.I have doing this from 8 years but what for? What have I achieved? All to see a few birds and animals who, by the way, will go extinct anyway.


On top of that, I am a Civil Engineer; I have worked on big projects that required forest clearances; the same tree on which I am searching for a species, the same tree was cut the next day. I love big projects. The grander, the better, but then they come in the way of the Naturalist "ME" One of my friends does photography for a living, but I don't have the guts and courage to that full time.


This long monologue is my dilemma with my hobby, but as soon as I entered the art gallery with photographs all around, I was transfixed, trying to see how they had made their composition, which camera they used, how much trouble these photographers took to click those photos, my son lost interest soon so I had to wrap up my trip a bit early but for me this was the moment when I realised how much I love Nature and Wildlife photography.


It's a sad hobby showcasing a dying natural world (Let's be honest, most governments don't give a damm about Nature); we are choking in polluted air, our rivers are choked with plastic, every forest in the world is threatened, half of the species are now endangered. I find it so paradoxical that whenever I click on an endangered species, I feel good because all my effort was worth it. But it's a shame that this species has got here, and probably my next generation won't even see them. Then why to shoot? Why fill those memory cards? Hard disks? Why to pay so much money? Why the Camera gear? Why this hobby? To feel good with the greenery? Or those Instagram likes?


The answer to these questions is difficult for me and for any wildlife nature enthusiast, but today, I least had some clarity; those photographs do one thing: show my small part as a conservator. I am not an environmentalist who takes up banners to save the world, I have huge resspect for those guys , but I don't have the guts and courage to that.


But I can show the world what is required to save, the beauty of the natural world unseen world hidden in the trees those not so glamerous grassands in our gardens, to show that why its important to protect all of them. My own small effort in conversation.


This earth is so much worth protecting. Its the only home we have. And its so beautiful and amazing!



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